Smirking Skulls
by IDontDance.Ever
Summary: "If you loved me so much Duncan, then why? Why did you cheat on me?" Courtney and Duncan meet each other ten years after TDWT, to find that some decisions were best never made


_AN: _If you want, you can skip this note. I normally do

But, if you are taking the tikme to read this, one, thank you. Two, this is the first story I have written for this site (don't let this turn you off, it's actually not all that bad) so, yeah. Try and be niceish. Or not, it's not like I'm ever going to find out. Unless you flame this. Which I'm hoping no one will...

Anyway, this story is DxC (duh), and is set about ten years after TDWT. Bit sad, bit happy. I'm labelling it bittersweet, you can call it what you want, don't really care.

Well, to end this annoyingly long authors note, my story. Smirking Skulls.

Enjoy! (or not...)

* * *

Where the HELL was my skirt?

Anyone looking into my bedroom window at that moment would have caught me in a bent position over my chest of drawers, pulling out all my clothes in a desperate search for a pinstripe skirt, while dressed in a light pink blouse, and purple undies.

Thank god my curtains were closed.

After pulling out an old scratchy jumper, and a pair of jeans I didn't even think I would buy, let alone wear, I found my skirt. A little crumpled, but nothing a good iron couldn't fix.

"Note to self, place all good skirts in wardrobe" I said to myself, slowly standing up, when something in the corner of the drawer caught my eye. I bent back down to pull out the object, and reached out my hand to grab it. Standing up, I examined the thing in my hand, until a bell rang in my mind, and I suddenly realised what this was. I dropped the object, as if it had burned the skin on my hand, ablaze with memories of hurt, betrayal, love, that horrible, horrible show, and...him.

_It couldn't be. I thought I got rid of everything that reminded me of him years ago._

I picked up the thing, and turned it over in my hand, remembering past happiness and bliss, feelings I hadn't experienced in such a long time…

"No Courtney, you are _not _going down that path again" I chastised myself. This was no time for regret, I had to remain strong. And in times when I feel weak, I do something that picks me back up again; make a list. Standing half naked in my room with no paper or pen on hand, I decided to do a mental one instead.

Option one: Keep it.

No, no, NO! I couldn't go back on my vow. A promise is a promise, and I had promised myself that I would get rid of everything that reminded me of him. I couldn't move on until I did.

Every time I found something that he had given to me, and I rid myself of it, I found it easier to move on. The more things that I had around that reminded me of him, the harder it was for me to find someone else. Maybe this was the reason Jake and I broke up, I thought, as I fingered the diamond engagement ring that I hadn't yet removed. Not that I couldn't take it off, I just wanted a reminder of what we had.

What we thought we had, anyway.

Option two: Put it in the memory box.

Bridgette, my only friend from that godforsaken show, had kept a box for me. A large box, big enough to hold a small, square shaped TV. That box contained every memory of Duncan. Every photo, every gift, every belonging, every article of clothing I couldn't bring myself to throw away. The box lived in the garage of the house that Bridgette and Geoff shared.

But this wouldn't work. Whenever I go to Bridge's now, I can feel all the…Duncan…radiating out of the box.

Ok, so that may not sound so rational, but it's true. And placing this thing in the box would just make matters worse. There was only one thing left to do.

Option three: Return it

I knew that this was what I had to do. It was the only option on my mental list left, and I never go off the list. Too many bad things happen when I go off a list. Dating Duncan was off my life list, and that particular part of my life went _so _well.

Sighing to myself, I placed the object on my bedside table, and continued my morning routine of getting ready, which was planned out from the minute I woke up to the minute I walked out the door, and it was always followed.

Except this morning, Once again, Duncan had disturbed my near-perfect life.

Why did I love that about him?

* * *

I came home from a hard day at work, arguing with clients and screaming at my boss, and retreated immediately to my bedroom, in need of a good nap. But as soon as I saw the thing staring at me from atop my bedside table, all thoughts of an after work nap were pushed out of my head. I grabbed the object, dropped it into my handbag and left my apartment after spending no more than two minutes in it.

Stepping inside my new Audi, I started my beloved car and started driving to a destination that I told myself I would never venture to again.

I drove out of the apartment block that I lived in, out onto the main road. Approximately eighty-three minutes and several turns later, I had driven down a street full of townhouses and pulled up at the curb of number 13A.

I stepped out of my car onto the sidewalk, and stared up at the house, remembering the last time I was here.

"_Geoff, are you sure this is a good idea?"_

"_Yeah Bridge, if Courtney ever wants to get over him, she's gotta let out her anger" _

"_But she's blind drunk? What if she does something she regrets?"_

"_Look, we won't take her inside. We'll just let her out of the car and let her yell shit at the house. It'll let her vent her anger. We know it's not good for her to be bottling it up"_

_Geoff and Bridgette look over their shoulders to face me sitting in the backseat, pissed after eleven and a half Corona's in two hours. _

"_Lemme go yell at me Dunkie" I sputtered, having left my sobriety behind long ago. "Only he's not my Dunkie anymore. He belongs to that gothic SLUT!" I spat on the floor of the backseat. _

"_Well, better she does that out here than in my new car" said Bridgette, letting me out of the car. _

_I stumbled out of the car and onto the sidewalk. _

"_Hey Duncan" I slobbered, making my way up his front lawn shakily. "It's your princess here. 'Cept I'm not your princess anymore. And you're not my cuddly delinquent bear now. You belong to that emo HOR!" _

_After this last comment, a light came on in the front room. _

"_Le-le-let me tell yoooouu a little fun fact. I LOVED you, Yeah, I LUUURRVED you!" I was now shouting at the top of my voice, and could hear movement in the house in front of me._

"_But not anymore. No, I don't LUURRVE you anymooooore. You love Gwen" I spat out her name with distaste, as well as the remnants of a lime from my drink._

_A figure came out of the house, but it wasn't Duncan._

"_Hey Gwennie! Wassup?"_

"_Courtney, what the hell are you doing?" she said, her arms crosses as she walked over to me in her black silk dressing gown, an expression of disbelief on her pale face. _

"_Oh, you now, just wanted to, uh, check out your flowers" I stumbled over to a flower patch a few feet away, and pulled out a rose. I brought it up to my nose, and took a deep whiff. _

"_Mmmm, smells like chicken"_

_Gwen stared at me, even more astonished. _

"_Any-anyway, I should pro-b-bab-ab-ly be leeeeeaving now, soooo, yeah" I retreated from the house, when I remembered something. I swung around to face Gwen again, swinging my arms to retain my balance. _

"_Oh, Gwenhor, can you tell Duncan that he sucks. DONKEY BALLS!" I turned back to the car, and pulled out an old black shirt. "And he can have his shirt back too!"_

_I threw the shirt onto the lawn, before the vigorous arm movements became too much for my alcohol-weakened stomach, and I threw up on the curb next to Bridgette's car. _

"_Did you get that all on camera, Bridge?"_

"_Sure did, babe"_

* * *

When I came to this house in my drunken state, two years after the last Total Drama show had ended, the house was well kept with a beautiful white exterior and an abundant garden.

Eight years on, the paint was peeling, the grass unmown, and what remained of the garden seemed long dead.

Duncan never was able to keep up with things.

I walked up the yard, trying to overlook the beer bottles, old shoes, and a substance that looked like a mixture of dog excrement and vomit. The porch wasn't much better, with spider webs in all the corners and a welcome mat that said "Get Stuffed".

That seemed like Duncan.

I rang the doorbell, heard no ring inside, and instead resorted to rapping my fist against the door. When I got no reply, I banged my fist repeatedly against the wood.

"Alright, alright, hold your friggin' horses. I heard you when you rang the bell" came an impatient voice from inside. It sounded different to Duncan's, groggier almost. I hoped he hadn't moved, I didn't know what to do with the thing if I couldn't give it back to him.

"What the hell is so important that you need to knock sever-" The man stopped talking when he opened the door. His face showed danger and annoyance, but his expression softened when he saw my face. He looked so different, it couldn't be…

"Princess?" he said, in disbelief.

I looked at Duncan closely. He still had those amazing teal eyes that seemed to take my breath away every time I looked into them, but they didn't look the same. They had lost their spark, and were dull and bloodshot, as if he had spent many a night drinking and not sleeping. His hair was unkempt, and only a touch of green was left from his Mohawk. His mouth seems like it could no longer make his signature smirk and he looked like he hadn't shaved in days.

This wasn't the Duncan I remembered. He seemed weaker, older and tireder.

"Princess, is that really you?" Duncan said again, coming closer to me. Instinctively, I stepped away. He understood the message and backed off.

I took a deep breath, it was now or never.

"Ok, my name is Courtney, not Princess. You lost the right to call me that when you hooked up with…Gwen" I said, pausing at _her _name. Duncan winced at my words, although I wasn't sure if it was because of what I was saying, or because my voice was having an effect on his hangover.

"Speaking of which, how is Gwen" I asked, not really caring about the answer. Duncan sighed.

"We broke up a few years ago. Don't remember how many"

"My sympathies" I replied dryly, trying to pretend I didn't care about the answer.

"Look, Prin-Courtney, as much as I am happy to see you, I'm guessing there is another reason you're here apart from criticising my life"

"Yeah, there is. I wanted to return something to you" I reached into my bag and pulled out the object that had caused me so much pain.

"Here. Take it. I don't want it anymore" I placed it in his hands, and he stared down at it.

"Is this…" he started.

"Yeah, it is. I couldn't throw it away when I found it this morning, so I thought I'd give it back to you…if you want it" I scratched the back of my head, slightly embarrassed.

"I remember carving this skull for you. It was after we first kissed. Kinda stuffed up my best penknife doing it, but you're worth it"

I noticed that he used present tense, instead of past, and I think he noticed too, because he seemed to regret his words. Duncan avoided my eyes, and instead looked down to my fingers, which were crossed with my arms in defensive stance.

"You're engaged" he said, pointing out the ring on my finger.

Oh crap, I had forgotten to take of my ring.

"Who's the lucky guy?" asked Duncan, after I didn't respond. His voice was shaky, as if he was trying to hold back tears.

"His name is Jake" I finally spat out. "Well, was, we're not engaged anymore. He, uh, broke it off" I said, remembering our short time together. We were both happy, right?

"My sympathies" Duncan repeated my previous words, but unlike me, he seemed to mean them. "Why did you two break up? If you don't mind me asking"

"We, just, well, we decided that we didn't work" Liar.

Duncan raised an eyebrow (or rather, half an eyebrow) at me. He could always spot my lies.

"Ok, fine. He left me because he didn't think that I loved him enough" I admitted. Duncan kept staring at me in that annoying way. "Which was not true. I did love him. A lot"

"Who are you trying to convince, me, or you?"

Great, the old Duncan was coming back, bit by bit. Fan-freakin-tastic.

"Look it doesn't really matter, the point is, we're over" I pulled of my ring and dropped it in my bag. "So, why did you and Gwen breakup? And I don't really care if you mind me asking"

Duncan laughed. God, I miss that laugh (gave myself a mental slap after that last thought).

"Uh well, Gwen and I really weren't meant to be. I tried to convince myself that she was better for me than you, I mean, we had so much more in common, same style, same interests, same hobbies, and she was fun to be around. And you, you were really uptight and…"

"Be very very careful with what you say, Duncan" I cut him off, his comments weren't exactly flattering and I was in no mood to be insulted.

"Look can you let me finish? OK, so you may have been uptight and bossy and stuck up, plus not to mention the slightly severe anger management problems, but that's what I love, err, loved about you. You were different. And Gwen, she just wasn't you" When he finished, he stared at me with a look on his face that I had only seen him use a few times before.

An awkward silence hung in the air above us. Neither of us knew what to say next.

"I, uh, had better be going, it's, um, the…." I racked my brains for an excuse to leave, but nothing came up. Why do I never think clearly around him?

"Courtney, just come in. Seriously it's no big deal" I was still unsure about it. "Look, nothing is going to happen, it's just two old friends seeing each other again" he said, slightly frustrated. Duncan grabbed my arm and pulled me inside, as I tried to ignore the electricity tingling on my skin where his hand was.

If I thought outside was bad, then inside was just horrible. The carpet hadn't been vacuumed for months and was decorated with an array of different beer bottles. Pizza boxes, McDonald cartons and various other takeout leftovers were on ever surface, and on the floor. Clothes were lying everywhere, and I had seen better kitchens.

"Soooo, Whaddya think?" said Duncan, a large grin on his face. I turned to face him.

"Duncan, I'm not going to lie to you, this place looks like shit" The grin stayed on his face as he meekly shrugged.

"Ah well, Gwen was always the one cleaning, or nagging me to do it. And now she's gone, no one cleans. I kinda prefer it this way" He plunked his behind down on the couch, pushing a Burger King box to the side. Grabbing the TV remote, he flicked on a football game, completely forgetting about me.

"Something's missing…." Had he remembered I was still here?

Duncan jumped off the couch and sprinted over to the fridge, where he pulled out a beer. Turning around he saw me standing there, impatient and annoyed.

"Wanna beer?" he asked, misinterpreting my near anger.

"It's five o'clock" Duncan stared at me blankly.

"No, I don't want a beer. Do you have any juice?"

"Uh, yeah, but not down here. There's some up in the fridge in my bedroom. Shouldn't be too out of date"

Eww. Well, I was thirsty.

"Can you get it for me?" I did _not _want to go into his bedroom. Not that I was scared or anything.

"I would Court, but…" Duncan jumped back onto the couch. "…I just sat down" I really hate him.

"Fine. Where is it?"

"First door on the left, up the stairs"

I grunted and turned towards the stairs. Pictures of Duncan getting drunk and having fun with his 'mates' (for the use of better words) coated the walls, and the carpet had various stains on it, which I wasn't eager to investigate. The landing at the top of the stairs wasn't much better, with stuff strewn everywhere. Duncan's door was covered in signs saying 'Hazardous Waste' and 'enter at won risk'.

I scoffed. Some things never change.

Pushing open his door and entering inside, I wasn't surprised that the room was a pig-sty. After seeing the parts of his house that I have, it's not like I was expecting a bedroom that looked like it would belong in a house and home magazine. Probably find this room somewhere is dumpster monthly. I spotted the mini-fridge next to an unmade queen size bed, doubling as a bedside table.

Bending down and opening the door on the fridge, I found several beer bottles, and what I was looking for, half a carton of orange juice. I picked up the carton and checked the expiry date.

"Last week. Not as bad as I thought it would be" I started to look around the room for a cup, realised that looking for anything in this mess would be pointless, and instead lifted the carton up to my lips and drank the rest of the contents of the juice. I placed the now empty carton back in the fridge (better than adding it to the rest of the mess in the room) and closed the door, when something underneath Duncan's bed caught my eye. A large box, big enough to hold a small, square shaped TV.

Being the nosy ex-CIT I was, I crawled under for a better look. Not wanting to stay under there for a better look (you do _not _want to know what else was under there) I pulled out the box, heavy as it was, and blew the dust off the top to reveal a shakily written name.

"Princess…" I whispered, not quite sure why. I stared at the box for a few minutes, wondering why in the world there would be a box with my name-well, nickname-under Duncan's bed. Then it got me thinking why _I _would have a box full of memories of Duncan. Maybe we had more in common than I thought. I was going to put the box back and let Duncan keep his privacy, when curiosity got the better of me, and I decided to open the box instead.

Inside was everything to do with, well, me. Photos of me and Duncan together, some of me alone. Old gifts that I had given to him years ago. Clothes of mine that I had left behind, and personal belongings that I had forgotten to get back. And his old skull shirt, which I had slept in for two years after we broke up, until I had the courage to throw it back when I was not-so-sober in front of his house. Something told me he hadn't washed it since then.

Which was sort of sweet. Gross, but sweet.

I pulled out a stack of photos, and flicked through them slowly, taking a long look at each one, and retrieving the memories that went with them from my head. I lost track of time, but I must have been there for a while just flicking through photographs, because Duncan came looking for me.

"Hey Court, where are you? You're not still looking for the juice, are y-"Duncan entered the room with a can of beer in his hand. When he saw me sitting on the floor against his bed, photos in my hands and the open box next to me, the beer fell out of his hand, making a puddle on the already dirty carpet.

"What are you doing?" he said, in a hushed voice, smaller than a mouse. He looked shocked, sad, and to my surprise, a little scared.

"You dropped your beer" I sniffed, my voice thick. I rubbed I tear out of my eye. Crap, I was crying.

"Princess, how did you find that?" said Duncan walking over to me, his voice still softer than a whisper.

"Well, I was putting the juice back, and it was under the bed, and it had my name-I mean, my nickname, on it and I thought…." I trailed off, realising he was no longer listening, but instead looking at the photo I was holding in my hands, He gently took it off me, and sat down beside me. I took a look at the photo, and discovered it was at Lake Wawanakwa at the day of the finals. Duncan and I were standing in front of the lake, arms around each other, laughing. You could see Owen's finger over the lens, blocking out part of the photo.

Good times, they never last.

"I remember this day…" said Duncan, fingering the photo with care.

"Who doesn't" I retorted. The final of Total Drama Island wasn't something anyone was going to forget in quite a while.

"I could never forget it. It was the day I figured out I loved you" I stared at Duncan as he lifted his gaze to my eyes. We sat like that for a few minutes, just staring.

"I never stopped, you know" I looked at him questionably. "Loving you. I never could" Duncan sighed and stared back down at the photo. Sudden realisation flashed through my body like a bolt of lightning, and I knew I had to get out.

"I-I've got to, uh go" I stammered, knowing that if I stayed here, here with Duncan, then breaking up with him all those years ago would have been for nothing. I pulled myself off the floor and begun to head for the door.

"Courtney, wait!" Duncan grabbed at my arm, but I yanked it away, and ran out of the room and down the stairs into the kitchen. I looked around quickly, trying to spot my handbag, when I heard Duncan leave his room. I didn't' realise how close he was until I was shoved into the cupboard.

"Duncan, let me go" I said, trying to get out of his stronghold. He had me restrained against the cupboard with his arms on both sides of me, hands above my head, and his body pressed lightly, yet firmly against mine. "Please, I have to get home"

"No, you don't. You're not going anywhere" Duncan stared me down, his teal eyes locked in with my onyx ones. With every second he looked at me, I felt myself growing smaller and smaller. Finally, after what seemed like a million years, he spoke.

"Why did you come here?" Was he really this stupid?

"I came here to return the skull to you. You know, the one you carved for me and gave it to me the night we left the island" The 'duh' was left unsaid.

"No, but why did you give it to me, Why not, I dunno, just throw it away?"

"I…uh" For once in my life, I was left speechless. Thank god Bridgette wasn't here to see it.

"You know what I think?" said Duncan, his eyes never leaving mine. "I think you still have feelings for me"

I glared at him. How dare he, how _dare _he even suggest something like that, after all he did to me. After Gwen, after our breakup, after everything.

"All the feelings that I had for you disappeared when you kissed Gwen" I replied, with a cold stare.

"And, if you supposedly loved me, why Duncan? Why did you kiss her?"

For the first time since he had pinned me to the cupboard, Duncan looked away from my face, and instead turned his gaze down to his feet before answering me.

"It was because I loved you"

An incredulous expression found its way to my face. This was unbelievable.

"So, let me get this straight" I said, trying to figure out the (limited) sense in his words. "You cheated on me, because you loved me. Yeah, that makes about as much sense as a smart Lindsey" Duncan looked away from his not so interesting shoes, and back up to me.

"I did it because I was in love with you. I was in love with you, but I didn't want to be" He let out a small, humourless laugh before continuing. "I mean, come on Court, you were the complete opposite of me. You were preppy, stuck up, bossy and destined for greater things. Me, well, I was none of those things. I didn't want to be in love with you, but I was. And despite how much I hated it, I liked the feeling, like you're the most important thing in someone's life, like they would do anything for you. I've never had anyone think of me like that before, and it made me happy, until I realised it was with a person that I probably wasn't doing the same for. I could never make you happy in the same way you did for me.

"I tried so hard to fall out of love with you, I tried arguing, hanging around other chicks, but nothing was working. But then, Gwen came along. She, well, she was everything I was looking for in a chick, and the fact that we were already friends made it so much easier. I could just, walk off into the sunset with her, and you would move on, and find someone who was better for you. Who was able to make you happy.

"After you found out about Gwen and I, and I saw how you reacted, I knew it was the wrong decision, but it was too late to turn back. I knew I'd lost you forever"

It was a while before I could find my voice to respond to him

"So, what you're saying is, you used Gwen" I was trying to focus on any part of that speech that wasn't about me. It would make it easier for me to walk out again and let me get on with the life I had worked so hard to get.

"Yeah, I guess I am" replied Duncan, still keeping his hold on me. "I feel bad about it. It wasn't the best breakup, and she just went back to Trent afterwards, who welcomed her back with open arms. Kinda makes me feel like our whole relationship meant nothing"

"Reminds me of another relationship I know"

He sighed. "Look Princess, I've said I was sorry, I admitted my undying love for you, what more do I possibly have to do to get you back?"

"Don't call me Princess! You have no right to call me that anymore. And if you think that I am taking you back after everything, then you've got another thing c-mph!" My rant was cut off when Duncan pressed his lips to mine. It all happened so fast I couldn't respond, push him off, or do severe damage to his 'jewels'.

After what seemed like a lifetime (r about five seconds to normal people) he pulled away and looked deep into my eyes. His soulful stare seemed to burn holes right through me.

"I-I-I…" Great. For the second time in five minutes, I was speechless. If Bridge ever finds out about this, god help me, I'd be a laughing stock.

Duncan smirked. "Got you speechless these, Princess"

"D-Duncan, le-let me go" I struggled against his grip, trying to break free.

He laughed and said "I'm afraid I can't do that babe"

"And why not?" I said, trying to keep my cool. And obviously failing.

"Because then, I can't do this" With that, Duncan bent down again and kissed me.

Except this time, I kissed back.

It was like an explosion of fireworks and butterflies erupting in my abdomen, and it felt like I couldn't go a second without kissing him, especially when he deepened the kiss, and wrapped one hand around my back, and tangled the other in my hair. The feeling of this, plus my hands around the back of his head, running through his hair, it made me wish we'd made up years ago.

Eventually, Duncan pulled away with a smirk on his face (and a groan from me). His eyes clearly said 'I won'. I really hated that cocky attitude of his. And his smirk.

"You know, I really hate that smirk of yours" I said, in between pants. That had been one hell of a kiss.

"And I really hate the way you pretend you don't want me" he replied. Before I knew it, we were kissing again and this time, I knew there was no stopping it, between either of us. Duncan wanted this as much as I did, and I wanted this real bad.

Duncan pulled away from my lips (another groan) and whispered three little words in my ear.

"Wanna go upstairs?"

This time, it was my turn to smirk.

"You bet your tight little ass I do" I said, giving it a squeeze. Duncan grinned devilishly, before leading me towards the staircase.

Before I walked up the stairs with him, I caught a glance at the kitchen table, where I could see my handbag, sitting right next to the skull. I realised that when Duncan had carved the skull, he had engraved his smirk onto its face. The skull seemed to stare at me as Duncan led me up the staircase to his bedroom while planting kisses on my neck, the smug little smile still on its face.

God, I hated that skull.

* * *

Yeah, wrote this out last year in a notebook, and took me a while to actually get it on a computer. Can be a bit lazy sometimes...

Like it? Hate it? Tell me in a review


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